My Place

Sometimes, it seems like everyone is out conquering the world. Everyone but me. My friends are all in college or finishing high-school. I feel out of place talking with my friends. I'm so proud of them, but it's such a contrast when I think about their jobs, their wonderful classes, and then I think of my daily schedule: sleep, doctor's visits, operations, sleep again, try desperately to keep up with school (and, heh, not really succeeding). It's hardly the schedule I had imagined for my senior year. And it's pretty disheartening fact.

And yet.

I've come to realize that it is disheartening only when I let it be. For the first time in my life, I'm not spending all my time doing 'big' things like spending hours on the piano, or teaching Latin, or keeping up a fun load of classes. I spend my days resting, trying to gain strength, enjoying calm times with my family, learning to appreciate life from a much slower pace than I'm used to. And it is so beautiful. God has blessed my life immensely - with an amazing family, the dearest friends in the world, and everyday wonders. This is my life now. And I have absolutely no cause to complain. At the end of the day, no matter how awful the pain is, or how 'useless' I feel, my eternal Father has ordained this. And it is for His glory and my good. What more can I ask?